Having “good vibes only” can actually be toxic positivity! Yup, that’s right.

While I’m all about positivity and how it can be a powerful coping mechanism — y’all sometimes it can get a little toxic without realizing it.

Toxic positivity forces you to suppress your feelings instead of dealing with them which is unhealthy mentally.

Do you find yourself saying these phrases to yourself? How does that make you feel?

• You will get over it

• Stop thinking about it

• I need to snap out of it, I have work tomorrow

• Other people have it a lot worse

• Smile — crying won’t help

• Being negative won’t help you

So many of us were brought up to believe that we had to always stay positive and put a smile on our faces even when we really don’t feel like it. While it might feel very contrary to what you’ve learned, feeling your feelings is so important and necessary. The only way out is through.

Next time you find yourself forcing yourself to “get over it,” instead of giving yourself love and compassion amidst your distress — slow down. Try taking a moment to sit with your feelings and treat yourself like a young child who is looking for love and comfort. This practice can take time but after a while, toxic positivity can become loving compassion for all emotions and experiences in life (not just the ones that would fit on an Instagram highlight reel).

Here’s to feeling and honoring how you feel,

Mallory