How to sit with someone’s pain
Supporting someone who’s in pain can feel awkward and uncomfortable, especially if you’re not sure what to do or what to say.
Simply acknowledging someone else’s pain or suffering is such a powerful means of support. It helps them feel seen and lets them know that it’s okay to feel the way they are feeling.
For many of us, our initial response is to offer advice, guidance or positive thoughts that come to mind. However, if you put yourself in their shoes, you’ll often realize that all they want to know is that their feelings matter.
Here are a few ways to help you show support to those around you who may be experiencing emotional pain or going through a loss.
Don’t minimize their emotions: honor how they feel and validate whatever feelings they are expressing. Don’t tell them to “look on the bright side.”
Show up and be present: simply being there in a time of pain is what matters. Do your best to be present and help them feel seen and heard.
Offer meaningful help and don’t give advice: although it is temping to offer advice and solutions, try to steer clear of giving your input unless it is asked of you. Instead, ask how you can be of service to them.
Actively listen and recommend additional help, if necessary: it can be very difficult to sit with someone in the midst of pain or grief, and if you feel that professional help is needed, kindly recommend additional help in a way that makes them feel supported and valued.
Supporting someone in a time of need is not easy, and it’s important to practice self-care in the midst of sitting with someone’s pain. Whether it’s setting boundaries, taking time to relax or meditate, or seeking out additional support for yourself, make sure to show up for yourself so that you may be of greater support to those who are suffering.
At Healing Pathways of Houston, we are here to support you. Book a call with us and let’s find ways to improve your mental health and wellbeing.
